Useful Definitions

Canar N. (kIn 'Ar; 'kAn Ir) A practitioner of a religion based on or heavily influenced by Wicca, Reconstructionism, any form of reclaiming, or Postmodernist/parody religions -- in short, any of several religions which have increased in popularity as a result of waning faith in Christianity and Secular Humanism as satisfactory philosophies. As such, it includes modern forms of JudeoChristian mysticism and "New Age," and does not include traditional religionists, such as Hindus and Buddhists: For the most part, canars have made a conscious choice to explore alternatives to Christianity and Judaism, rather than inheriting non-JudeoChristian religions as part of their cultural upbringing. Adj. canaric (kIn 'Ar Ik). (More details.)

Wonderlander N. A naive form of canarism usually characterized by an embrace of a primitive form of cultural relativism, the attitude that any religion that promotes positive values is valid, and that the world is a wonderful place. Taken this far, Wonderlanderism would be merely annoying, in the way that Boy Bands and smurfs are annoying, but Wonderlanders frequently attack when confronted with suggestions that their beliefs are not grounded in historical likelihood, or that the original worshippers of Mars and Venus might find it odd to have them worshipped together.

Fluffbunny N. See Why Wiccans Suck. Basically, a derogatory term for Wonderlanders, especially reserved for those who are particularly hypocritical, abrasive, and logically inconsistent.

Fluffer N. In pornography, the person who keeps male stars "fluffed" (erect) while he's off-screen. In canarism, a very derogatory term for Wonderlanders.

Fluffernutter N. Another derogatory term.

Satanism N.

1. In reality, a diverse set of belief systems derived on the concept of materialism and sensuality demonized by Christianity, consisting of a hodgepodge of Christian heretics, atheists, and polytheists estranged from Christianity.
2. In Christianity, an evil heresy devised by ne'er-do-wells to annoy Christians.
3. In Wonderlanderism, an evil heresy devised by ne'er-do-wells to annoy Wonderlanders.

Wicca N.

1. In reality, a religion popularized, and perhaps created by, Gerald Gardner in the first half of the 20th Century, based on a combination of Christian ceremonies, feminism, and perceptions about British folk traditions.
2. In Wonderlanderism, Wonderlanderism, which is a reconstruction of a pre-Jewish matriarchal warless society that came to Marija Gimbutas in a greed-induced dream, wherein she was shown a road with two paths: One, the academic path, destined to keep her in relative obscurity but intellectual integrity; the other, the Separatist Feminist path, destined to make her famous at the cost of said integrity. It is suspected that Satan sent her that dream.

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